I am so sorry for being late but I have been busy lately .
I took a quick look at what you have writen and came up with this conclusion :
1- you have to be careful when using prepositions : for example , in number 1 you used with instead of OF and at instead of IN and so on > Unfortunaltly there is no rule in using them .
2- try not to write in english as if you are writng in arabic because the structure is different and the way it is said is different too .
3- try to use the continuous tense when it is needed and also the v+ing after the prepositions as in number 2 (entering and not enter )
4- try to use simple english when choosing the vocab. because every thing starts step by step .
Finally , your english is very good and don't be ashamed from using it even if make mistakes because we learn from our mistakes and the one who doesn't make mistakes , doesn't learn .
I hope I did what you were looking for and I appologize again .